Disappointed.

A little.

Fine, I lied.

Maybe a lot.

Ok fine, I lied again.

So I am VERY DISAPPOINTED.


There.

Reason- Add Maths paper 2. Screwed up piece of shit.

I did worse than mid term. Triple the amount of time and effort put into it, I did worse than mid term. Sometimes, I can't believe I'm this smart. The disappointment, the dissatisfaction, the bitterness, the(put in whatever adjectives similar) is getting me. Before this feeling sunk in, nobody is gonna tell me I did fairly well before I snap.

I was quite contented when I got back my paper 1 marks. Its like what Aimy said, your effort will be paid off. Was about to believe in it and ta-daaa, my paper 2 decided to kill me just like how my BM paper 1 did.

I AM SO ANGRY WITH MYSELF OK! Its not like I've never experience that before, but just this time, its different.

Some people might say for my standard, its good enough. I probably got the highest in class. In fact, I probably beat a couple of people from the second class. SO WHAT? Its doesn't matter to me if I beat people smarter than me or anything similar to it. I don't show off my marks unlike well, certain people. I don't. I just want to meet that damned standard that I've set because I know I can. Yeah, I can. I can already imagine some people smirking and that thought is not pleasant.

Effort gone to waste. Just like how some people spent their days doing Add Maths and Maths and nothing comes out of it.

Now I can be like them, officially.

And the fact that there isn't any jolly happy things to cheer me up, this sucks.

I think I'm gonna start engrossing myself into a good book-to numb this bitterness till reality check tomorrow. And maybe I should take up lessons on the hair flip thingy from Dapho, it might come in handy. ;)

Till then.